The Kindness of Strangers

Tonight I bought an ice cream bar and then promptly dropped it. Other people in line offered to let me get back in line in front of them, and then the employee just handed me a new bar and told me not to worry about it. There are few things I love more than easy kindness that feels like God holding you.

Right after typing the above, I read this story, which speaks to the same point: https://www.upworthy.com/opposing-team-members-surrounded-a-soccer-player-whose-hijab-slipped-and-its-fabulous

One Moment I Knew I Was in the Right Place

At the volleyball team's first playoff game, staff from across the school came to support the team. Lower, Middle, and Upper School teachers, the Business Office, the Diversity Director, and the Head of School were there along with bleachers full of students and parents. And all on a staff work day when students didn't have school. Pretty special!

The Spirituality of Waiting

I love the Irish Jesuit's Sacred Space books for Advent and Lent. They empower me to maintain the right mindset and heart space during those periods of spiritual preparation. In the spirit of not hoarding, I am letting go of some of the old books. Here are some of my favorite quotes therein:

Advent/Christmas 2015-16:

• "The ends and the beginnings - past and future -- are always in the present tense of love."

Lent 2016:

• Jesus "is determined to break down dramatically the barriers that fragment human community . . . if we want to be with him at the table, we must accept the companionship of people we previously despised."
• "I ask for the grace to be free of my own preoccupations and open to what God may be saying to me."
• "We can be smug and content with our conventional good behavior. Jesus, however, says to us: "But what about your anger? What about insulting someone? Do you despise anyone, ever? Such behavior won't do anymore."
• "our hearts must embrace our enemies in genuine love."
• "If we work int he world we must, again and again, climb to the top of the mountain, to be alone with God and with ourselves, our memories and desires. There we renew our strength to continue the struggle for a more just world."
• "God is with me, but more, God is within me. Let me dwell for a moment on God's life-giving presence in my body, in my mind, and in my heart"
• "without an eye for the needy around us, our life becomes self-centered and callous. Jesus is asking his listeners to open their eyes to what is around them and to open their ears to the simple commands of the gospel: love your neighbor."
• "Prayer is enjoying moments of being loved."
• "conversion is possible; we can return to our best - our truest - selves, and when we do we will find our loving God ready to welcome us home with open arms."
• "I remind myself that there are things God has to teach me yet and ask for the grace to hear them and let them change me."
• "Wise love takes many forms: it is not timid and passive; it can be demanding as well as long-suffering."
• "I am God's dwelling place."
• "Cleanse my heart and would so I may live joyously in your love."
• "We, too, are never alone; the love, grace, and help of God are always with us."
• "Jesus' promise is that the truth will make us free. Lord, I do want to be free, so let me listen to those who tell me the truth about myself. Let me listen also to your word, which tries to reach into my heart and liberate me."
• "We are asked to suffer, if necessary, in order to foster the values of the kingdom . . .Jesus shows us how to bear it with love. Such love radiates and inspires others."
• "Lord, when I find myself critical of others, it may be my own warped vision that needs to be corrected."

Lent 2017:

• "Lent is a good time to stop our activity long enough to look at it carefully, prayerfully, and to determine the specific truths of the situation."
• "Holiness is a greater marvel than special effects but less easily recognized."
• "Jesus, help me be fully alive to your Holy Presence. Enfold me in your love. Let my heart become one with yours."

Advent and Christmas 2018-19:

• "The true light . . . enlightens everyone"
• "How will I know when it is my time to decrease, and how can I prepare my heart to respond graciously?"

Lent 2019:

• Listening to Christ means "setting out on the journey with him to make oneself a gift of love to others"
• "Prayer increases within us our capacity to love."
• "Do I share with [God] all that I am living, my struggles and my joys, and the concrete situations for which I need his help?"
• "[Jesus'] open and generous heart is the heart of God, inviting us all to rest where we are known and loved, to find enduring life and lasting refreshment." 
• "You know how painful it is if your motives are misunderstood, if a twisted interpretation is put on your good intentions. Such experiences help you identify with Jesus and feel with him. Be there with him; share your experiences with him." 
• "Do I think ill of others more readily than I credit them with good? Lord, give me the grace to see the best in others, as I'd wish them to see the best in me." 
• "I find it so easy to feel superior to others in one way or another while being blind to my own shortcomings."
• "I have no right to look down on those whose sins are paraded in the media."
• "Prayer for another strengthens bonds, softens hearts"
• "Compassion, kindness, and courage in my life are what make my words credible. May my life reflect what I profess."
• "What is my image of God? The best image is to see God as Pure Love."
• "If we live in this way, we transform the world."

Lent 2020:

• "service that is large-hearted and humble."
• "I ask for the grace to trust myself totally to God's love."
• "Jesus is the one of universal welcome . . . I ask him to open my heart to be as welcoming to his."
• Luke 1:38 -- Mary: "let it be with me according to your word."
• "We are all called to live the truth."
• "God is with me, but even more astounding, God is within me."
• "Teach me to live in the knowledge that you will never abandon me [or others!]."
• "help me to follow you and thus accept truth and demonstrate it through love." 
• "Do I appreciate that I, too, am a temple of the living God?"
• "We might allow moments of prayer this week to reach the zones within us that need tolerance, healing, and forgiveness."
• "Jesus, may I give to you freely and not care about others' opinions and reactions."

Wisdom from Rebecca Solnit's Call Them by Their True Names

"Naming is the first step in the process of liberation." (1)
"Being careful and precise about language is one way to oppose the disintegration of meaning, to encourage the beloved community and the conversations that inculcate hope and vision." (4)
"Equality keeps us honest." [I would add that that is true in schools too!] (15)
"Women [have a] tendency to gather and ally rather than fight or flee." [This is what people often misunderstand about all girls schools when they say they must be filled with "catfighting."] (44)
From John Muir: "When we try to pick out anything by itself, we find it hitched to everything else in the Universe." (48)
"The reality of facts . . . are, after all, part of a network of systematic relationships among language, physical reality, and the record." (50)
"what we do begins with what we believe we can do. It begins with being open to the possibilities and interested in the complexities." [This can also be called moral imagination] (58)
"Often, it's an example of passionate idealism that converts others . . . Sometimes, rather than meeting people where they are, you can locate yourself someplace they will eventually want to be." (76)
"A city is a book we read by wandering its streets" (136)
"Not just a tolerance of difference, but a delight in it, love for it" (147)
About Standing Rock: "the people most involved seemed to get it tat this is a really nice chapter, not the end of the story, and you can celebrate that chapter." (149)
"the importance of knowing that we don't know what will happen next and have to live on principles, hunches, and lessons from history." (150)
"Stand[] up for what you believe in, even when victory seems remote to impossible." (150)
"Consequences are often indirect." (151)
"When activism wins, it's because, at least in part, the story has become the new narrative, the story the mainstream accepts." (158)
"Breaking a story is usually a prolonged, collaborative process. It usually begins with activists, witnesses, whistleblowers, and with victims, the people affected, the people on the front lines the people to whom the story happened. The next step is often carried out by people with storytelling powers who are willing to listen." (161)
Daniel Ellsberg: "You can't be objective, but you can be fair." [This is true in teaching too] (162)
"Every bad story is a prison; breaking the story breaks someone out of prison. It's liberation work. It matters. It changes the world." [Also what teachers do!] (163)
"Actions often ripple far beyond their immediate objective, and remembering this is a reason to live by principle and act in the hope that what you do matters, even when the results are unlikely to be immediate or obvious." (173)
"Hope for me has meant a sense that the future is unpredictable . . . but know we may be able to write it ourselves." (174)
Patrice Cullors on Black Lives Matter's mission: "rooted in grief and rage but pointed toward vision and dreams." (175)
"Ideas are contagious, emotions are contagious, hope is contagious, courage is contagious. When we embody those qualities, or their opposites, we convey them to others." (180)
"Consensus leaves no one out." (183)
"The only power adequate to stop tyranny and destruction is civil society, which is the great majority of us when we remember our power and come together . . . This work is always, first and last, storytelling work, or what some of my friends call 'the battle of the story.' Building, remembering, retelling, celebrating our own stories is part of our work." (184)
"This work will only matter if it's sustained. To sustain it, people have to believe that the myriad small, incremental actions matter. That they matter even when the consequences aren't immediate or obvious. They must remember that often when you fail at your immediate objective  . . . even then, you may have changed the whole framework in ways that make broader change more possible. You may change the story or the rules, give tools, templates, or encouragement to future activists, and make it possible for those around you to persist in their efforts." (184-185)

I love retreat!

I have always loved retreat. I love the opportunity to take a breath and reflect on my journey. Another gift of retreat is that it often reminds me to offer gratitude for the natural world.

Rent

A couple weekends ago I decided to watch Rent: Live mostly on a whim. The production, which was fine but not great, reminded me of how much of an impact Rent has had in my life. I remember singing songs from Rent at (cast?) parties in middle school. We sang "Seasons of Love" in my eighth grade graduation. I'm pretty sure Rent was the first musical I saw on Broadway, on the same trip with friends (just after college?) during which I realized that Times Square was real. I loved, and own, the movie version and cried all over again when I watched it the day after Rent: Live. I've been listening to the various soundtracks on repeat for the past two weeks.

Rent is a beautiful story of people creating family. It centers people on the margins. It encourages all of us to be ourselves, no matter the consequences. And it calls us to love. I'm grateful to have it back in my life and hope to not have so long a break from its magic again.

The Power of Stories

I’m currently reading the book The Lost Art of Reading by David Ulin, which I love because it reminds me of why I love to read. He has a line in which he describes how we bring books to life by how we engage with them and how the books we read become a part of us as well. I can’t help but think of books like Just Mercy and My Promised Land and how deep an impact they have had on my understanding of the world. I’m currently on a memoir kick, and learning about what shapes people I respect has been meaningful in expanding my understanding of the beautiful and painful complexities of our world. As Gabrielle Union writes in her memoir, We’re Going to Need More Wine, “In the end, we are our stories."